Did you know that being Deaf or HOH can feel really, really lonely?
I was born completely deaf (physical, not cultural) on my left side. I've never known anything different. To me, that was just life. I thought everyone had one quite ear and one loud (read that as hearing) ear. The concept of deafness was not really introduced to me.
In private school through pre-school, kindergarten, and first grade, I really struggled, and my teachers were actually going to hold me back because of how much I struggled. Friendships didn't really happen there, either, so that was also missing. My grandmother, GOD bless that wonderful woman, picked up that burden and homeschooled me. She gave me the best education I could have ever had. I don't think anyone could have given me a better education. Still, she didn't know I was deaf on one side. She and Mum suspected something was up, but had nothing to really go on.
We found out when I was 9 that I'm deaf on one side. I've told the story of how we found out HERE.
After we found out I that I'm partially deaf, Mum found a hearing gal at church who knew some sign language and asked her to teach us. Oh, so bad...that was horrible. We met once a week, with basically only vocabulary words, had only two other students besides Mum and I, we never met any Deaf, and learned nothing about Deaf culture. THAT didn't last long. We gave up on ASL after that. She was not a good teacher.
About six years ago, my hearing on my good side began to gradually decline. It took us the past six years to see this decline, and we don't yet know why I have it. (I really need to get a hold of a Neuro-otologist, but that means I have to use a phone ...*cringes*) It's a slow decline, but it's there. My upper range on my right side is now going, and if I'm anything like my mother and grandparents, this will likely be a steady decline for the rest of my life.
I started learning sign language last year, and I was hooked. However, I'm the only one in my family who signs much. Mum knows a little, but it's not the same as having someone who practices a lot.
So now I really cannot hear much in crowds, and am still gaining proficiency in ASL. I have no complete language to use in public settings where I'm not missing something. This is a really big disadvantage at church, because people don't understand what deafness is, other than the medical side of it. And sometimes, not even that. Trying to communicate at church is hard, and it's even harder when people speak quietly, or even just stop talking to you because it's too difficult for them. I tend, now, to gravitate towards louder people in church, but even then, I'm still missing out.
So, in terms of a social life, I have almost no friends, and any friends I do make tend to drift away, because it's so stressful to try to communicate. I feel so lonely, so very much. I wonder if this is how other partially Deaf people feel.
I was born completely deaf (physical, not cultural) on my left side. I've never known anything different. To me, that was just life. I thought everyone had one quite ear and one loud (read that as hearing) ear. The concept of deafness was not really introduced to me.
In private school through pre-school, kindergarten, and first grade, I really struggled, and my teachers were actually going to hold me back because of how much I struggled. Friendships didn't really happen there, either, so that was also missing. My grandmother, GOD bless that wonderful woman, picked up that burden and homeschooled me. She gave me the best education I could have ever had. I don't think anyone could have given me a better education. Still, she didn't know I was deaf on one side. She and Mum suspected something was up, but had nothing to really go on.
We found out when I was 9 that I'm deaf on one side. I've told the story of how we found out HERE.
After we found out I that I'm partially deaf, Mum found a hearing gal at church who knew some sign language and asked her to teach us. Oh, so bad...that was horrible. We met once a week, with basically only vocabulary words, had only two other students besides Mum and I, we never met any Deaf, and learned nothing about Deaf culture. THAT didn't last long. We gave up on ASL after that. She was not a good teacher.
About six years ago, my hearing on my good side began to gradually decline. It took us the past six years to see this decline, and we don't yet know why I have it. (I really need to get a hold of a Neuro-otologist, but that means I have to use a phone ...*cringes*) It's a slow decline, but it's there. My upper range on my right side is now going, and if I'm anything like my mother and grandparents, this will likely be a steady decline for the rest of my life.
I started learning sign language last year, and I was hooked. However, I'm the only one in my family who signs much. Mum knows a little, but it's not the same as having someone who practices a lot.
So now I really cannot hear much in crowds, and am still gaining proficiency in ASL. I have no complete language to use in public settings where I'm not missing something. This is a really big disadvantage at church, because people don't understand what deafness is, other than the medical side of it. And sometimes, not even that. Trying to communicate at church is hard, and it's even harder when people speak quietly, or even just stop talking to you because it's too difficult for them. I tend, now, to gravitate towards louder people in church, but even then, I'm still missing out.
So, in terms of a social life, I have almost no friends, and any friends I do make tend to drift away, because it's so stressful to try to communicate. I feel so lonely, so very much. I wonder if this is how other partially Deaf people feel.
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